Miata Mailing List: September 1999, Message #139
![[previous topic]](../images/prev_topic.gif)
![[index]](../images/index.gif)
![[next topic]](../images/next_topic.gif)
| From: | "Jay Schale" <schale@nts-online.net> |
| Subject: | (NMC)Murder at the Grocery Store |
| Date: | Wed, 1 Sep 1999 17:30:41 -0400 |
>>Tired of constantly being broke, and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young >>husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance >>policy on his wife (with himself as the beneficiary), and arranging to have >>her killed. >>A "friend of a friend" put him in touch with a nefarious underworld figure, >>who went by the name of "Artie." Artie explained to the husband that his >>going price for snuffing out a spouse was $5,000. >>The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he wouldn't >>have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. >>Artie insisted on being paid SOMETHING up front. The man opened up his >>wallet, displaying the single dollar bill that rested inside. Artie sighed, >>rolled his eyes, and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down >payment >>for the dirty deed. >>A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Foodworld >grocery >>store. There, he surprised her in the produce department, and proceeded to >>strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew >her >>last breath, and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce >department >>stumbled unexpectedly onto the scene. Unwilling to leave any witnesses >>behind, Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well. >>Unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by hidden cameras >and >>observed by the store's security guard, who immediately called the police. >>Artie was caught and arrested before he could leave the store. >>Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the sordid >>plan, including his financial arrangements with the hapless husband. >> >>(scroll down) >> >> >> >> >> >>DRUM ROLL >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >>( PAUSE) >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >>And that is why, the next day in the newspaper, the headline declared, >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >>[You're going to hate me for this]: >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >>"ARTIE CHOKES TWO FOR A DOLLAR AT FOODWORLD." >> >