Miata Mailing List: March 2000, Message #43

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This almost sounds like Dave Berry to me!

Ron Veenker


>Guys are born with a fundamental, genetically transmitted mental condition
>known to psychologists as:
>
>The Fear That If You Get Attached to a Woman, Some Unattached Guy,
>Somewhere, Will Be Having More Fun Than You.
>
>This is why all married guys assume that all unmarried guys lead
>lives of constant excitement involving hot tubs full of naked international
>fashion models; whereas in fact for most unmarried guys, the climax of the
>typical evening is watching an infomercial for Hair-in-a-Spray-Can while
>eating onion dip straight from the container. (This is also true of married
>guys, although statistically they are far more likely to be using a
>spoon.)
>
>So guys are extremely reluctant to make commitments, or even to take
>any steps that might lead to commitment. This is why, when a guy goes out
>on a date with a woman and finds himself really liking her, he often will
>demonstrate his affection by avoiding her for the rest of his life.
>Women are puzzled by this, "I don't understand," they say, "We had such a
>great time! Why doesn't he call?"
>
>The reason is that the guy, using the linear guy thought process, has
>realised that if he takes her out again, he'll probably like her even
>more,so he'll take her out again, and eventually they'll fall in love with
>each other, and they'll get married, and they'll have children, and then
>they'll have grandchildren, and eventually they'll retire and take  a trip
>round the world, and they'll be walking hand-in-hand on some spectacular
>beach in the South Pacific, reminiscing about the lifetime of experiences
>they've shared together, and then several naked international fashion
>models will walk up  and invite him to join them in a hot tub, and he won't
>be able to do it.

--
Ronald A. Veenker
Philosophy & Religion
Western Kentucky University
Bowling Green, KY 42101
off:  270-745-5755
fax:  270-745-5261

"One day we will look back on this.... and plow into a parked car"